Childs Mind.........

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Until a child tells you what they are thinking, we can't even begin to imagine how their mind is working....

Little Zachary was doing very badly in maths.
His parents had tried everything...tutors, mentors,

flash cards, special learning centers.

In short, everything they could think of to help his math.

Finally, in a last ditch effort, they took Zachary down and enrolled him in the local Catholic school. After the first day, little Zachary came home with a very serious look on his face. He didn't even kiss his mother hello.

Instead, he went straight to his room and started studying.


Books and papers were spread out all over the room and little Zachary was hard at work. His mother was amazed. She called him down to dinner.

To her shock, the minute he was done, he marched back to his room without a word, and in no time, he was back hitting the books as hard as before.


This went on for some time, day after day, while the mother tried to understand what made all the difference.


Finally, little Zachary brought home his report Card.. He quietly laid it on the table, went up to his room and hit the books. With great trepidation, His Mom looked at it and to her great surprise, Little Zachary got an 'A' in maths.
  She could no longer hold her curiosity. She went to his room and said, 'Son, what was it? Was it the nuns?' Little Zachary looked at her and shook his head, no.. 'Well, then,' she replied, Was it the books, the discipline, the structure, the uniforms? WHAT WAS IT?'

Little Zachary looked at her and said, 'Well, on the first day of school when I saw that guy nailed to the plus sign, I knew they weren't fooling around.'





Safari Story

Monday, September 28, 2009

Short Safari story,
One of the great photo captions of all time...........
Just look at the lion…. :-)


Power of Punctuation !

Thursday, September 24, 2009



Wednesday, September 23, 2009

A married couple in their early 60s was celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant.
Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table. She said, 'For

being such an exemplary married couple and for being loving to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish.'

The wife answered, 'Oh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband.'
The fairy waved her magic wand and - poof! - two tickets for the Queen Mary II appeared in her hands.
The husband thought for a moment: 'Well, this is all very romantic, but an opportunity like this will never come again. I'm sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me.'
The wife, and the fairy, were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish. So the fairy waved her magic wand and poof!....the husband became 92 years old.

The moral of this story: Men who are ungrateful #@&%$#* should remember fairies are female.



Bird Flu and Swine Flu

Tuesday, September 22, 2009



Never get into Inter - Species Relationships!!!!!!   J


4 Sons

These 4 gents go out to play golf one sunny morning. One is detained in the clubhouse, and the other three are discussing their children while walking to the first tee.
"My son Kent," says one, "has made quite a name for himself in the home-building industry. He began as a carpenter, but now owns his own design and construction firm. He's so successful in fact; in the last year he was able to give a good friend a brand new home as a gift."

The second man, no to be out done, tells how his son began his career as a car salesman, but now owns a multi-line dealership. "Norm's so successful, in fact, in the last six months he gave his friend two brand new cars as a gift."

The third man's son, Greg, has worked his way up through a stock brokerage, and in the last few weeks has given a good friend a large stock portfolio as a gift.

As the fourth man arrives at the tee, another tells him that they have been discussing their progeny and asks what line his son is in.

"To tell the truth, I'm not very pleased with how my son turned out," he replies. "For 15 years, Chico's been a hairdresser, and I've just recently discovered he's gay. However, on the bright side, he must be good at what he does because his last three boyfriends have given him a brand new house, two cars, and a big pile of stock certificates."


Marvel that is an Engineer - The Great

Thursday, September 17, 2009

[1] Marvel that is an Engineer - Practical

Two engineering students were walking across a university campus when one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday, minding my own business, when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike, threw it to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want." The second engineer nodded approvingly and said, "Good choice; her clothes probably wouldn't have fit you anyway.

[2] Marvel that is an Engineer - Exact

To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

[3] Marvel that is an Engineer - Discriminative

What is the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers?
Mechanical engineers build weapons and civil engineers build targets.

[4] Marvel that is an Engineer - Probing Mind

The graduate with a science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with an arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

[5] Marvel that is an Engineer - Detailed

Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, "It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints. "Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections. The last one said, "No, actually it had to have been a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"

[6] Marvel that is an Engineer - Perfectionist

Normal people believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it.
Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it is perfect, then expand it and add more features until it breaks.

[7] Marvel that is an Engineer - Values

An engineer was crossing a road one day, when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.

The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week." The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a Princess, I'll stay with you for one week and do ANYTHING you want."

Again, the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess and that I'll stay with you for one week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?" The engineer said, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that's cool."

[8] Marvel that is an Engineer - Resilient

Cold of Economy gives them Pneumonia yet they survive and flourish everywhere.


Bhains : Really innovative international literacy day campaign

Tuesday, September 15, 2009


From a Bachelors Diary

Friday, September 11, 2009

Long live Bachelors

Every man should get married some time; after all,

happiness is not the only thing in life !!


Bachelors should be heavily taxed.
It is not fair
that some men should be happier than others.

--Oscar Wilde

Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.

--Scottish Proverb

I don't worry about terrorism.
I was married for
two years.

--Sam Kinison

( i loved this one )
Men have a better time than women; for one thing,
they marry later; for
another thing, they die earlier.
--H. L. Mencken

When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows

When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone
wonders why.

Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.

When a man opens the door of his car for his wife,
you can be sure of
one thing:
either the car is new or the wife.

I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding
her way back to home always.


I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our
anniversary?" She said,"Somewhere I have never been!"

I told her,
"How about the kitchen?"


We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

My wife was in beauty saloon for two hours.
That was only for the estimate.


She got a mudpack and looked great for two days.
the mud fell off.


She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too
late for the garbage?"

Following her down the street I yelled, "No, jump in."


Badd Teddy recently explained to me why he refuses
to get to married.

He says "the wedding rings look like minature

If your dog is barking at the back door and your
wife yelling at the frontdoor, who do you let in first?

The Dog of course... at least he'll shut up after u
let him in!


A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly
parted mother and started back toward his car when

his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave.
The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity
and kept repeating, 'Why did u have to
die? Why did you have to die?"
The first man
approached him and said, "Sir,
don't wish to interfere with your private grief, but this
demonstration of pain in is
more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so

Deeply? A child? A parent?"The mourner took a moment
to collect himself, then
"My wife's first husband."

A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband
leaned over, made a wish
and threw in a
coin .
The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she leaned
over too much, fell
into the well, and drowned. The husband was stunned
for a while but then
" It really works ! "


Interesting Management Stories

Wednesday, September 9, 2009



Interesting Management Stories

Story # 1

It's a fine sunny day in the forest and a lion is sitting outside his cave, lying lazily in the sun. Along comes a fox, out on a walk.

Fox: "Do you know the time, because my watch is broken"
Lion: "Oh, I can easily fix the watch for you"

Fox: "Hmm... But it's a very complicated mechanism, and your big claws  will only destroy it even more."
Lion: "Oh no, give it to me, and it will be fixed"

Fox: "That's ridiculous! Any fool knows that lazy lions with great claws cannot fix complicated watches"
Lion: "Sure they do, give it to me and it will be fixed"

The lion disappears into his cave, and after a while he comes back with  the watch which is running perfectly. The fox is impressed, and the lion continues to lie lazily in the sun, looking very pleased with himself. 


Soon a wolf comes along and stops to watch the lazy lion in the sun.

Wolf: "Can I come and watch TV tonight with you, because mine is broken"
Lion: "Oh, I can easily fix your TV for you"

Wolf: "You don't expect me to believe such rubbish, do you? There is no way that a lazy lion with big claws can fix a complicated TV.
Lion: "No problem. Do you want to try it?"

The lion goes into his cave, and after a while comes back with a perfectly fixed TV. The wolf goes away happily and amazed.

Scene :
Inside the lion's cave. In one corner are half a dozen small and intelligent looking rabbits who are busily doing very complicated work with very detailed instruments. In the other corner lies a huge lion looking very pleased with himself.

Moral :

Management Lesson in the context of the working world :


Story # 2

It's a fine sunny day in the forest and a rabbit is sitting outside his burrow, tippy-tapping on his typewriter. Along comes a fox, out for a walk.

Fox: "What are you working on?"
Rabbit: "My thesis."

Fox: "Hmm... What is it about?"
Rabbit: "Oh, I'm writing about how rabbits eat foxes."

Fox: "That's ridiculous ! Any fool knows that rabbits don't eat foxes!
Rabbit: "Come with me and I'll show you!"

They both disappear into the rabbit's burrow. After few minutes, gnawing on a fox bone, the rabbit returns to his typewriter and resumes typing.


Soon a wolf comes along and stops to watch the hardworking rabbit.

Wolf: "What's that you are writing?"
Rabbit: "I'm doing a thesis on how rabbits eat wolves."

Wolf: "you don't expect to get such rubbish published, do you?"
Rabbit: "No problem. Do you want to see why?"

The rabbit and the wolf go into the burrow and again the rabbit returns by himself, after a few minutes, and goes back to typing. Finally a bear comes along and asks, "What are you doing?

Rabbit: "I'm doing a thesis on how rabbits eat bears."
Bear: "Well that's absurd ! "

Rabbit: "Come into my home and I'll show you"

Scene :
As they enter the burrow, the rabbit introduces the bear to the lion.


Management Lesson in the context of the working world:



The Bombay Spirit...Aamchi Mumbai

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

This can happen only in our Bombay (Aamchi Mumbai) where else. Read

Only local train passengers in Bombay will know how helpful commuters
try to be......  Last week, a hapless victim fell prey to the over
enthusiastic Bombay's local train commuters.

Our hero, a man from Pune, wanted to go to Matunga, but as luck and Trains
would have it, boarded a fast train not halting at his destination. He
panicked on realizing his mistake but by then the local had started moving.
On seeing his plight, a sympathetic co-passenger decided to come to his

It seemed that he had been commuting by that particular train (6:03 pm
Kasara Fast) for the past 6 years and had noticed that the train always
slowed down just before Matunga station and crawled at a snail's pace while
passing through it. He told the man to jump out of the running train as it
slowed down and that with a little bit of fleet-footedness, he would make it
safely on terra firma. However, knowing the man's inexperience, he added
some words of caution:

"Keep running the moment you jump or you'll fall. Just keep running." He
stressed the word "running" lest the man not know the laws of motion.
The train did slow down just before Matunga station and at the prompting of
His mentor, our hero jumped out of the train and started running as if
allHell had broken loose.

What he didn't realise, of course, was that he was running parallel to the
train instead of running away from it. Meanwhile, the train slowed down
further, so that the man was running faster than the train. In the process,
he reached the door of the next compartment and the footboard commuters
there pulled him in thinking he was trying to board the train!

To his agony, the train picked up speed and sped past Matunga and his new
co-passengers started to congratulate him on how lucky he had been, until he
told them that they had actually undone what he had done with

Those standing at the door of his "ex-compartment" had witnessed the whole
drama and just couldn't stop laughing at the poor man's situation, while he
grinned sheepishly!! !

Ae dil, hai mushkil, jeena yahaan,  
Zara hatke, zara bachke,  
Yeh hai Bombay meri jaan


Bijoya SMS - 1

Sunday, September 6, 2009

Dhaker kathir biday sure, Udas kore mon; Chollen Ma Mahamaya, Aj ke bisor jon. Anande te katuk jato chawa joto pawa..ami aj tomake janai SUBHO BIJOYA.

bijoya elo...chharo taka,maa...
bijoya elo...chharo taka,maal kheye pore thaka,pronaam niyo baba..kaka..!!!

Bisharjaner dhak Uthlo beje.Mo...
Bisharjaner dhak Uthlo beje.Mon lage na r kono kaje.Nil akashe sada megher,nitya aasa jawa mayer ashise puron hok.. Sabar chawa pawa.SUBHO BIJOYA

ebar mago biday tobe,asche b...
ebar mago biday tobe,asche bachor abar hobe,shobai ke ma rakhis shukhe,Bijaya aj misti mukhe.Subha Bijaya !!!!!

* Ssshhh!!! T...
* Ssshhh!!! Those empty spaces were my silent prayers, asking Maa Durga to guide & protect YOU always in whatever YOU do & wherever YOU are!SHUBHO BIJOYA

Sukher sriti rekho mone, Mishe theko apon jone, Maan-avimaan sakol vule, Khushir pradip rekho jelo, Hazar khushi tomar mukhe pujor dine theko Sukhe.....

Ruddhya moner duar khule elo khusir jowarSamoy elo notun vabe notun mon chhoyarNoyon majhe megher alo puray moner ichchaPathalam tai tomay " SARAD SUVECHCHA"

amra ebar nritya korbo Mayer Pujar dhaker badi te, nesha hobe dhup dhonate, chokh jhal jhal korbe mayer bhasanite........,

Ashchay moder durga puja, katchey diner din,ai bhabonai cholchay moder din

ashirwad bado ka, pyar dosto k...
ashirwad bado ka, pyar dosto ka, duaen sabki, karuna rabki,dussehra ki hardik shubhkamnaey


Durga Puja SMS - 1

Saturday, September 5, 2009

May maa bless you
With happiness all the year through!
Wishing you a happy durga puja

May Maa Durga Durgatinashini b...
May Maa Durga Durgatinashini bring joy to youand your loved ones .May the Divine blessings Of Maa Durga be with you always!Happy Durga Puja

Durga Puja Khushio ka,Ujalo ka, Ma Durga ka.... Is Durga puja Aapki Jindagi khushio se bhari ho,Duniya ujalo se roshan ho, ghar par Maa Durga ka Aagman ho... Happy Durga puja

On this auspicious occasion of Durga Puja, I wish you are blessed with prosperity and success by Ma Durga.HAPPY DURGA PUJA

Sarva Mangal Mangallye,Shive Sarvarth Saadhike,Kshranney Trambake Gawri,Narayani Namostute...

Himer paras mone jage sabi jeno notun lage agamonir khabor peye boner pakhi utlo jege sishirveja notun bhore ma asche mortoloke. Happy durga puja!

dhaker tale dhunuchi naache etai prachin riti,mone prane bandhiye rekho durga pujor smriti...

Long live the tradition of Hindu culture,
as the generations have passed by,
Hindu culture is getting stronger and stronger
lets keep it up.
Best Wishes for Dashain.


Dussehra, Vijaya Dashmi SMS - 1

As the candlelight flame
Ur life may always be happy,
As the mountain high
U move without shy,
As sunshine creates morning glory
fragrance fills years as Flory,
All darkness is far away
As light is on its way.
Wishing U all a very Happy Vijaya Dashami.


On this auspicious occasion,
I wish the color, bliss and beauty
Of this festival…
Be with you throught the year!
Happy Dussehra


May this Dussehra,
light up for you.
The hopes of Happy times,
And dreams for a year full of smiles!
Wish you Happy Dussehra.


Navratri SMS - 1

Fortunate is the one
Who has learned to admire,
But not to envy.
Good wishes for a joyous Navratri,
With a plenty of peace and prosperity.


This Navratri, may you be blessed with good fortune
As long as Ganeshji’s trunk,
Wealth and prosperity as big as his stomach,
Happiness as sweet as his ladoos
And may your trouble be as small as his mouse.
Happy Navratri


Memories of moments celebrated together
Moments that have been attached in my heart forever
Make me Miss You even more this Navratri.
Hope this Navratri brings in Good Fortune
And Long lasting happiness for you!
Happy Navratri


Ramadan SMS - 1

The holy month of Ramadan,
For all Muslims has begun.
Praising Allah through the day,
From dawn to dusk we fast and pray.
We pay zakah (charity) for those in need,
Trying hard to do good deeds.
Wishing you wonderful Ramadan.


after few

Barkaton n Rehmaton ka Mah-e-Mubarak
Happy Ramadan Mubarak
Remember me in ur prayers.


As the Fajar azan begins
And the 1st holy fast begins
May Allah bless you with happiness
and grace your home with warmth & peace.


May This Ramadan be as bright as ever.
May this Ramadan bring joy, health and wealth to you.


May the festival of lights brighten up you
and your near and dear ones lives.
May this Ramadan bring in u the most
brightest and choicest happiness and
love you have ever Wished for.


May this Ramadan bring you the
utmost in peace and prosperity.
May lights triumph over darkness.
May peace transcend the earth.
May the spirit of light illuminate the world.
May the light that we celebrate at Ramadan
show us the way and lead us together on the
path of peace and social harmony
Wish you a very happy Ramadan Mubarak


Welcome Ramadan
Walk humbly
Talk politely
Dress neatly
Treat kindly
Pray attentively
Donate generously
May ALLAH bless & protect you…


As the crescent moon is sighted…
And the holy month of Ramadan begins…
May Allah bless you with happiness
grace your home with warmth & peace !



Ganesh Chaturthi Puja - 2

GANESH ki jyoti se noor miltaha hai
sabke dilon ko surur milta hai
jobhi jaata hai GANESHA ke dwaar
kuch na kuch zarror milta hai

As you celebrate Ganesh Chaturthi
May Lord Ganesha shower his choicest blessings on you and your family


Ganesh Maharajki Jai...........May Lord Ganesh removes all obstacles, and gives U happieness to you and your family and entire to the society.Happy Ganesh Chaturthi..


May Lord Ganesha bestow
Happiness and
Prosperity upon You and your family


Jai Shri Ganesh


May the Lord vigna vighna vinayaka
remove all obstacles and shower you with bounties
Jai Shri Siddhi Vinayaka


I wish u Happy Ganesh Chaturthi and
I pray to God for your prosperous life.
May you find all the delights of life,
May your all dreams come true.


Dhoomraketu, Sumukha, Ekadantha,
Gajakarnaka, Lambodara, Vignaraja,
Ganadhyaksha, Phalachandra, Gajanana,
Vinayaka, Vakratunda, Siddhivinayaka, Surpakarna,
Heramba, Skandapurvaja, Kapila, Vigneshwara.
He is also known by many as Maha-Ganapathi.
Happy Birthday to Lord Ganesh.


At Ganesh ChatrurthiHoping this Ganesh Chatrurthi will be the start of year that brings the happiness for you.Happy Ganesh Chaturthi.

GANESH ki jyoti se noor miltahaisbke dilon ko surur milta hai,jai Ganesh!!


Ganesh Chaturthi Puja - 1

G - Get
A - Always
N - New
E - Energy
S - Spirit &
H - Happiness.

Wish U Happy Ganesh Chatruthi......


May GOD GANESHA remove every obstacle from your path forever!
Wish U Happy Ganesh Chatruthi......


At ganesh chatruthi hoping this Ganesh chatruthi will be the start of year that brings the happiness ganesh chaturthi wishing that lord Ganesh...fills your home with...prosperity & fortune... Best wishes on ganesh chatrurthi


Happy Ganesh Chaturthi sms
At Ganesh Chatrurthi
Hoping this Ganesh Chatrurthi
will be the start of year that
brings the happiness for you.
Happy Ganesh Chaturthi.


Wish you a blessed Ganesh Chaturthi and many prosperous days ahead.


GANESH ki jyoti se noor miltahaisbke dilon ko surur milta hai,jobhi jaata hai GANESHA ke dwaar,kuch na kuch zarror milta haiJAI SHREE GANESHA


I pray to God for ur prosperous life.
May you find all the delights of life,
may ur all dreams come true.

At Ganesh ChatrurthiHoping this Ganesh Chatrurthiwill be the start of year thatbrings the happiness for you.Happy Ganesh Chaturthi.



Facts Factor

Thursday, September 3, 2009

1. If time doesn't wait for you, don't worry!
Just remove the damn battery from the clock and Enjoy life!

2. Expecting the world to treat u fairly coz u r a good person is like
expecting the lion not to attack u coz u r a vegetarian.

Think about it.

3. Beauty isn't measured by outer appearance and what clothes we wear,
but what we are inside

So, try going out naked tomorrow and see the admiration!

4. Don't walk as if you rule the world,
walk as if you don't care who rules the world!

That's called Attitude…! Keep on rocking!

5. Every lady hopes

that her daughter will marry a better man than she did
and is convinced that her son will never find a wife as good as his father did!!!

6. He was a good man. He never smoked, drank had no affair.
When he died, the insurance company refused the claim.
They said, he who never lived, cannot die!

7. A man threw his wife in a pond of Crocodiles?
He's now being harassed by the Animal Rights Activists for being cruel to the Crocodiles!

8. So many options for suicide:
Poison, sleeping pills, hanging,
jumping from a building, lying on train tracks,

but we chose Marriage, slow sure!

9. Only 20 percent boys have brains, rest have girlfriends!

10. All desirable things in life are either
illegal, banned, expensive or married to someone else!

11. Laziness is our biggest enemy- Jawaharlal Nehru
We should learn to love our enemies- Mahatma Gandhi

Ab aap bataaye kiski sune bapu ki ya chacha ki???

12. When things go wrong, when sadness fills your heart,
When tears flows from your eyes always say these words…

Eh Ganpat, chal daru la…

13. 10% of road accidents are due to drunken driving.
Which makes it a logical statement that
90% of accidents are due to driving without drinking!


Why husbands don't answer

Tuesday, September 1, 2009


WIFE: 'What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?

HUSBAND: 'Definitely not!

WIFE: 'Why not? Don't you like being married?'

HUSBAND: 'Of course I do.

WIFE: 'Then why wouldn't you remarry?

HUSBAND: 'Okay, okay, I'd get married again.'

WIFE: 'You would?'

HUSBAND: .......?

WIFE: 'Would you live in our house?'

HUSBAND: 'Sure, it's a great house.'

WIFE: 'Would you sleep with her in our bed?'

HUSBAND: 'Where else would we sleep?'

WIFE: 'Would you let her drive my car?'

HUSBAND: 'Probably, it is almost new.'

WIFE: 'Would you replace my pictures with hers?'

HUSBAND: 'That would seem like the proper thing to do.'

WIFE: 'Would you give her my jewelry?'

HUSBAND: 'No, I'm sure she'd want her own.'

WIFE: 'Would she wear my shoes'

HUSBAND: 'No, her size 6.'

WIFE: -- silence -

HUSBAND: 'shit'




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