Sachin's Appraisal by His MANAGER

Thursday, February 25, 2010

200 Runs/ 147Balls/ 25X4 / 3X6
 
Agree you have done GREAT BUT BUT BUT BUT
 
 
25 x 4s = 100
3 x 6s   =  18
 
IT implies that you have done 118 Runs in 28 Balls.
 
And 12 x 2s = 24
       58 x 1s = 58
 
IT means you have done all 200 Runs in only 98 balls
 
So you have wasted 147-98 = 49 balls
 
Considering only 1 run scored on each of these balls you could have earned 49 valuable RUNS FOR OUR TEAM
 
MANAGER’S COMMENT: So you only met the expectations and NOT EXCEEDING (though anyone of our team could not do it) and your Grade is C
                                       
Trainings for him: Learn from how to STEAL singles. ( you better know what I mean stealing single ) 
  
 

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Jokes

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

She don’t know how to use:

 

As I was nursing my baby, my cousin's six-year-old daughter, Krissy, came into the room. Never having seen anyone breast- feed before, she was intrigued and full of all kinds of questions about what I was doing.

After mulling over my answers, she remarked, "My mom has some of those, but I don't think she knows how to use them."




She Has Destroyed My Golf Passion
 

Saturday morning I got up early, dressed quietly, made my lunch, grabbed my golf bag, tried not to wake my wife, sneaked quietly into the garage and proceeded to back out into a torrential down pour.

The wind was blowing 50 mph. I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad throughout the day.

Disappointed I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and sneaked back into bed. There I cuddled up to my wife's back and whispered, 'The weather out there is terrible.'

My loving wife of 20 yrs replied, 'Can you believe my stupid husband is out there playing golf in that terrible weather?'

I still don't know to this day if she was joking, but I have stopped playing golf.
L

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Marriage ke Side Effects

Thursday, February 18, 2010

 “When a man holds a woman hands?”

When a man holds a woman’s hand
before marriage, it is love;  after marriage it is self-defense

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Man before Marriage is like Airtel…. “Aisi Azaadi Aur Kahaan”

After Marriage He’s Like Hutch… “Whereever U Go Our Network Follows.”

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What is Marriage?
Ans:
1 year:-Alpenlibe-Ji lalchaye raha Na Jaye.
2 year:- KINETIC-Sab ki hawa Nikal de.
3 year:-CHLORMINT- DOBARA MAT PUCHNA…..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Why do we all marry?
Because romance is not
the only element of life.
We should also know horror,
terror, suspense, irony,
stupidity & tragedy of LIFE.

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What a married man says after years of marriage:-
My marriage is made of Trust & Understanding, she doesn’t Trust me & I dont Understand her.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Golden Rule:-
‘To be happy with a man,
love him little and understand him a lot.

To be happy with a woman,
love her a LOT and DO NOT TRY to understand her

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*Love b4 Marriage*
Janu…tum nahi to main nahi,
main nahi to tum nahi…

*Love after Marriage*
“bagairat”…Aj tu nahi ya main nahi

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Boy friend is fun,
&
Husband is gun,

Boy friend is light of moon,
&
Husband is month of june,

Boy friend is tooty fruity,
&
Husband is qismat phooti

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Banta owned a factory.
He issued orders that only married
men would be employed.
Friend asks: Why this ?

Banta reply:
Because married men are more obedient.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

True relatives always
stand behind u during bad times.

Check ur marriage album.
All your relatives were standing behind u!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Before marriage:
Roses are red, sky is blue,
O my darling! I love you…

After Marriage:
Roses are dead,
I have flu,
don’t come near me,
Paray hatt tuu,

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Only true friends stand by u
during bad times.
I promise
I will attend ur wedding.

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A blog for SMS, Occasion specific SMS, New Year SMS, Diwali SMS, Holi SMS, Birthday Special SMS, Christmas, Id, Dusshera, Shivratri, Rakshabandhan, Independence Day, Republic Day, Lohri, Makar Sakranti, Festival SMS, Romantic SMS, Flirt SMS, Laughter SMS, Shayari, Teasing, Friendship, Miss U, Punjabi sms, Hindi sms & funny jokes

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