Santa Banta ... Fun continues...

Santa sent SMS to his BOSS: Me sick, no work. 
Boss SMS back: When I am sick I kiss my wife try it. 
Two hours later Santa sms 2 boss: Me ok, ur wife very sweet.   
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Santa ki chatri me hole tha, kisine pucha, umbrella mein hole kyu? 
Sardar bola: Oye barish ruk jayegi to pata kaise chalega.   
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Santa: Why has the Govt. fixed voting age 18yrs & marriage age 21yrs? 
Banta: Govt. ko pata hai ki desh sambhalna aasan hai, lekin biwi ko nahi. 
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Banta: Pareshan lag rahe ho. 
Santa: Yaar baap ban ne wala hu. 
Banta: Yeh to khushi ki baat hai. 
Santa: Lekin biwi ko nahi pata. 
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Santa bada dukhi tha, kisi ne pucha itni tension me kyon ho? 
Santa: Ek dost ko 3 lac plastic surgery k liye diye the, ab use pehchan nahin pa raha   
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********* THE BEST ONE ! ! ! ! ! 
Driver: Sir ji, petrol khatam ho gaya , gaadi aage nahi ja sakti. 
Banta: Chalo Phir, wapis le chalo. 
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Santa: Wo dekh teri biwi ko saanp kaat raha hai. 
Banta: Are tension mat le, Jeher bharwane aya hoga...   
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Banta: Kal Muje 10 logo ne Peeta. 
Santa: Phir tune kya kiya? 
Banta: Maine kaha salon ek-ek karke aao. 
Santa: Phir? 
Banta: Phir kya, Salon ne ek-ek karke dubara Peeta !     
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Pappu: Ajj madam ne 1 swaal puchhya jisda jawab sirf mainu hi pata si. 
Santa: Mera biba beta, ki swaal si? 
Pappu: Swaal si k blackboard kol susu kine kita hai?   
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Inspector to Banta: Faansi se pehle, bata teri antim ichha kya hai? 
Banta: Mere pair upar aur sir neeche kar k faansi de do..! 

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Santa Banta ... Fun continues

• Santa proposing a girl: Darling kya tum mujse shadi karogi?
Girl: Tameez se baat karo..
Santa: Behan ji, kya aap mujhse shaadi karoge?

• Inspector to Santa: Faansi se pehle, bata teri aakhri ichha kya 
hai?Santa: Mere pair upar aur sier neeche kar k faansi de do!

• Santa: I tried ur number so many times, it always said 'Switched 
Off'!"
Banta: Nooo, it's my HELLO TUNE!

• Beggar: Oh sundari, andha hoon, paanch rupya de de.
Santa to his wife: De de, De de, tujhe sundari bola hai to har haal 
main ye andha hai.

• Banta: Jab main paida hua tha to military walon ne 21 topein 
chalayeen thi. Santa: Kamaal hai ! Sab ka nishana chook gaya ?

• Q: What do you call a man who can't hear anything?
Santa: Anything you want because he can't hear na!!!

• Santa: What is the similarity between Bill Gates n Me? 
Banta: Don't know...
Santa: Well... He never comes to my house & I never go 2 his!

• Girl: Will you love me after marriage also?
Santa: This depends on your husband, if he allows me.

• Santa: Is operation se mujhe kuchh ho gaya to isi doctor se shadi 
kar Lena ...
Jeeto: Aise kyo kah rahe ho?
Santa: Doctor se badla Lene ka yehi 1 rasta hai!

• Santa-Bus stand jane k kitne paise?
Rikshawala: 10 Rs
Santa: 2Rs mein chalega to theek hai
Rikshawala: 2Rs mein kaun le k jayega?
Santa: Peeche baith main lekar jata hoon.

• Santa bought a car on loan..... He didn't pay the dues, the bank 
took away his car
Santa: If I knew this, I'd have taken a loan for my marriage also!

• Banta mujra dekhne gaya , sari raat mujra dekha.
Bai ne kaha: Sahab humne aap ko khush kiya, ab aap hume khush karo. 
Banta utha or khud nachne laga.. 

• Banta was driving his car in a zigzag fashion on d road. Traffic inspector stopped him.
Banta: I'm learning car driving.
Inspector: Without d instructor?
Banta: Correspondence Course!

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