Sunday, May 17, 2009
78. When A Man Steals Your Wife, There Is No Better Revenge Than To Let Him Keep Her.
79. Eighty Percent Of Married Men Cheat In America, The Rest Cheat In Europe.
80. After Marriage, Husband And Wife Become Two Sides Of A Coin. They Can't Face Each Other, But Still They Stay Together.
81. Marriage Is When A Man And A Woman Become One.The Trouble Starts When They Try To Decide Which One.
82. Before Marriage, A Man "Yearns" For The Woman he Loves. After The Marriage The "Y" Becomes Silent.
83. "I Married Miss Right, I Just Didn't Know Her First Name Was Always."
84. It's Not True That Married Men Live Longer Than Single Men. It Only Seems Longer.
85. Losing A Wife Can Be Hard. In My Case, It Was Almost Impossible.
86. WIFE: Let's Go Out And Have Some Fun Tonight.HUSBAND: OK, But If You Get Home Before I Do, Leave The Hallway Lights On.
87. At A Cocktail Party, One Woman Said To Another:"AREN'T YOU WEARING YOUR RING ON THE WRONG FINGER?"The Other Replied, "YES, I AM. I MARRIED THE WRONG MAN."
88. Man Is Incomplete Until He Gets Married, Then He Is Finished.
89. It Doesn't Matter How Often A Married Man Changes His Job, He Still Ends Up With The Same Boss.
90. A Man Inserted An Ad In The Paper - "WIFE WANTED".The Next Day He Received A Hundred Letters And They All Said The Same Thing:"YOU CAN HAVE MINE."
91. When A Man Opens The Door Of His Car For His Wife, You Can Be Sure Of One Thing - Either The Car Or The Wife Is New.
92. "Honey, when we get married, I'll be there to share all your troubles and sorrows.""But I don't have any, my love." "I said, when we get married"
93. Women are confusing...Before marriage they expect a man, after marriage they suspect a man, after he dies they respect the man.
94. What is defference between man and Superman? Man wears underwear under the trouser and superman wears it over the trouser.
95. Sailor (reading from book of facts): "Do you know that every time I breathe a man dies?" Banta: "Why don't you use a mouth wash?"
96. Sign in wallpaper and paint store: "Husbands choosing colors must have note from wives"
97. How do you stop a Pakistani tank? Shoot the guys pushing it.
98. On the first day of marriage, the husband is treated like god...after that the letters reversed
99. What are the signs of iron deficiency? Crumpled clothes.
100. Did you hear about the guy that lost his left arm and leg in a car crash? He's all right now.
101. The 3 fastest means of communication: Telephone, Television, Tell-a-woman